Well, those 2 months flew past! In some ways so much has happened, and in others not much at all really.

I had my surgery for my Carpal Tunnel – on both hands – and it is all going pretty good. One hand got infected and the result was that the scar was thicker and less mobile (and more painful) but silicon patches seem to be fixing that. Most of the feeling is back in my fingers – just the tips of my middle fingers to go – and I no longer get the shooting ‘electric’ pains up my arms which is certainly a bonus.

I am so lucky I have such fabulous boys – proud mother moment 😀  – they have looked after me, driven me where I have needed to go, cooked for me and generally let me heal without rushing it. I certainly couldn’t have done this without them and definitely not both hands at once. As well as them, I am so grateful for my friends who helped with driving Lachlan to school for 3 weeks, not to mention keeping up my spirits when I was just so fed up, as did some special friends online.

During that time I also did a group session with Emazon, although I couldn’t participate in the practical aspect, it was still an amazing experience. I was trying to think how to describe what happens and it’s actually quite difficult as every person’s experience is different. I am not going to try to explain, if you are interested check out www.emazon.tv for more information and if you ever get the chance to spend some time with her, go for it.

I know that I came away knowing that things would happen in the right time for me, and in a way that I could deal with. I think what she does so well is not tell you anything but guides you in a way that you understand yourself more and ‘learn’ things that you probably deep down ‘knew’ already but were just not getting.

The next day I had a one-on-one session with her and afterwards I understood so much more about me and my life and where it was going. I love that she asks the questions but lets you work it out for yourself. I am not saying everything instantly became clear but among other things, I realised that I am my own person and labels given to me so many years ago, and more recently, did not need to and no longer define who I am.

Part of what we talked about was my passions, one of which is writing and that brings me to the next exciting thing that has happened. I applied for and was accepted as an editor for the Bereavement site on Bella Online I am still in training, which I have to say is fabulous but have started to add some articles. As I have made the commitment to write a minimum of one article a week this will keep my writing going and hopefully help get me jump-started on my book again. Check it out at http://www.bellaonline.com/site/Bereavement and feel free to like the articles 😀

The reason I chose this topic, which may seem a little odd to some, is that I am passionate in helping people understand there is no wrong way to grieve; that we all process things in different ways and have to do what is right for us. I think I am a good fit with this site as I have experienced grief and bereavement from the point of view of a wife, a daughter and helped my sons as a mother, plus I work in the aged care industry.

And last, but certainly not least, I have re-joined 12wbt for the next round. It is time, and I am ready. Pre-season started this week and the first exercise is excuses.

I did these last time and thought I would have learnt but I guess not as not surprisingly, the same ones surfaced again, plus a few. So I am putting them out there – if I say them out loud it is harder to let them sneak back in, if for no other reason than my friends know about them – so here goes …

My excuses (and my answers/solutions)

1. My hands – work around them and it is time to stop using them as an excuse
2. I am too tired – JFDI – you know you will feel better
3. Lachlan can’t do it today so I will wait and go with him tomorrow – seriously? Be a good role model and just do it!
4. It’s too cold – rug up!
5. My foot hurts – walk through it – short walks – do a DVD so you can rest if need be – that’s rest – not stop
6. What’s the point – all my exercise friends are so much fitter than me and I will never catch up so why bother – so what! They started before you and so what if you don’t catch up – it’s not a competition, just do what you can do!
7. I can’t be bothered – JFDI
8. There is nothing to eat – be organised, buy ahead and check the freezer!
9. It’s too late to cook so let’s just have something easy – as above – be organised, buy ahead and check the freezer!
10. It’s my working week and I am tired and I have to work again tonight and … – get over it and JFDI – you have been working nights for over 20 years now and have lost weight successfully so you know you can do it again – and plan!!
11. It all  just seems to hard – yes it will be hard but do I want to keep feeling like this? – NO!! and you know once you start you feel SO much better and you didn’t put the weight on over night so don’t expect it to come off like that!

I am sure I will think of more, but there is always a solution, and for now I am excited about eating good food again and getting back to exercising properly and with my awesome exercise friends.

I have decided this time to be more active and visible on the forum and FB groups. It’s so much easier to hide things if no –one knows you are there!!